Friday, September 18,2020
Here’s why many relationships don’t get far with the excitement they begin with. Here’s why.
There’s a happy phase of relationships that everyone who has ever had a partner knows too well. Those are the early days when you can do no wrong, when your partner’s words are sweet to your ears like honey to the tongue.
Those are the first weeks, months even, when the newness of it all keeps you going more than anything else. Happiness is keenly felt by both partners and life literally feels like a bed of roses.
All relationships begin with that excitement but too many of them never go far with it. Somewhere along the way, that excitement dries up from far too many relationships and what’s left is a relationship that feels empty and boring and monotonous, with the partners in it struggling to rekindle the kind of good feeling they derived from each other when the relationship first began.
As Randi Gunther Ph.D. writes for Psychology Today in 2011; “in all seriousness, boredom in a relationship is often cause for alarm, but there’s really no need: most of us get bored with everyday routines, because we are human and we crave variety.”
As if it’s not bad enough that people in relationships fall into a routine and never maintain the newness of their relationship, some partners even step down on those great things great things.
They reduce the effort they once used to put into the relationship. The cease the efforts of the early days which are actually meant to be continued with beautiful variations and then they wonder why their relationship becomes boring.
Here’s the thing; if you continue doing the same things you used to do at the beginning of the relationship, and in the same manner you did them, you’ll fall into stagnation because doing the same things in the same manner always becomes boring.
Stopping to do them altogether is even worse. It’s a crippling kind of complacency that’ll cause a rust and rot in the connection you have with your partner and you should never allow it in your relationship.
To avoid boredom, always strive to retain excitement in your relationship. The reason why your relationship was fun and exciting at the beginning was because the novelty of all the things you did then. Everything felt new, different, the experiences were fresh and breathtaking. That is what you should always strive for.
Relationships are never hurt by trying new undertakings, shaking things up, and generally moving and shaking everything around.
To never the guy or babe who bores their partner is one more relevant relationship goal to add to the ones you already have.